Cease Fighting and All Kinds of Good Things Happen


That's my boy. I told him not to smile for the photo, so this pretty atypical of that bounce-around, hip-hoppin' side-winder. (And yes, he does come at me from the side. The boy loves to scare the bejeebers outta me, so much so that I practically pee in my pants!)

I have to tell you how happy I am. I am so excited, so content, so stressed-out (yep, contradicting myself) and I have so much confidence that the future will be AOK. There are so many gifts bestowed upon me, my arms are not big enough to hold them all.

I cease fighting — one of the best decisions I made thus far. I feel light and free, not looking back lest I catch the pallid scent of my past life, happy or not. That cavernous pain is too risky to be hinging on the edge of, lest a mere glance backwards trips me into its wide and deep mass grave of buried memories, better left forgiven and forgotten. I'm happier moving forward, forgiving — yes, even forgiving — and counting my blessing which are plentiful. I get "bad news" constantly. I have difficult things to face each day. They come quickly, like arrows sped from a bow. They glance off me, my shield held up indiscriminately. I have super human powers these days.

In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one; Ephesians 6:16

I can't be bothered. There are too many grievous instances to let emotions delegate my day. NO... I'm happy, faithful, excited to see what God has in store for me next. These things, some of which are really quite big, are just blips in my radar screen. Sure there are things in my life that someone else might feel devastation over. Meh... I've been thru the wringer. Been there. Done that. Not gonna do it anymore. My weapons relinquished. OK fine. Let's cut our losses. Lets find another way. Lets see what the options are. I'm too tired not to be direct. I am not mincing words. I'm not wasting anymore precious time getting angry and frustrated, feeling sorry for myself.

There is a force that is arming me with a calmness and a sense of joy while at this very moment I'm walking thru one of life's most difficult challenges.

I have trust and I am expecting my life to be full of great things.


  1. AWESOME! Beautiful post. Gorgeous photo of your son. Love the arrows, the bible verse, the cartoon illustrations. I can feel the strength in your writing.

    Hugs, ~R

  2. THAT right there is an answered prayer! I read something today that basically said: what if your worst fear came true, and you realized that God was still good?

    You have been there. You are there. You can survive anything!

  3. What a beautifully written post! It provides so much insight into your world & thought process, your heart. And it also provides encouragement for those of us lost out in the wildernes for reasons all our own. You’re an inspiration! Thank you!


  4. I have been following your blog (found it via a link from a friend), and I have commented a few times. I have felt your frustration, your inability to move out of the depths of despair, and often your enlightenment. You always come out fighting no matter how low you go. You are strong, Andrea, and I am glad to be part of your journey. You inspire me.

    1. Thank you for your sweet note. You may not know it, but the idea of people reading my blog over a period of time is incredibly helpful to me. I feel supported, like I have cheerleaders silently in the sidelines, giving me high-fives along the way....

      thank you!! :)


  5. Yes. Fighting can *look* more powerful, but "Lets find another way. Lets see what the options are" might actually *be* more powerful.


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