Dignity and Grace

Two words which I am carrying with me....
Dignity – elevation of character; worthiness; indicative of self-respect or appreciation
Grace – the freely given, unmerited favor and love of God; God operating in humans to regenerate or strengthen them

I haven’t had a lot of time to write lately! I know you all have been checking in. Sorry I missed you! And in fact, tonight I’m only able to write a brief post (unedited of course), a summary of my latest events and affairs of the heart.

The weekend was a blast. Each January, I spend a weekend in Chicago with my girlfriends. We have a lot of laughs, giggles, food, chocolate and late night chats. We almost always make it a spiritually filled weekend, and this was no exception. We attended a conference with a lot of inspirational speakers. There were several in the line up from all over the country, and many pointed us right back to God. By Sunday we were filled with the Spirit and ready to face our lives again, renewed in our beliefs.

I also took the last two days off of work so that I could catch up with my son. Since I work all week, the weekend is where Oliver and I get to reconnect again. It’s difficult to give up my weekends, altho at times it’s necessary. Oliver’s father was kind enough to shift our days around, and thanks to my work schedule (albeit packed), I was able to slip out for two days.

In the midwest, we’ve been slammed with a fair amount of snow, nothing that isn’t unlikely in the icy winds of January. But I caught a bug at the conference, so I’ve been achy and feverish the last two days. There’s little rest for the weary tho with a toddler running around. I did get to nap both days, but I’m beat, achy and just basically bleh..... so I have to hit the hay soon!

Emotionally, I’m doing great. I am finally, FINALLY feeling strong, confident and renewed. I feel like I am going to be OK; I’m going to make it thru this. I’m even questioning some things and feeling like I am no longer riding the coat tails of Matt’s volitional crisis. I’m actually loving my life and my time apart from him. I’ve fallen into a state of Grace... protected and calm. I’m beginning to act with Dignity. I hope to journal more thoughts on this at some point. Just know that these two words have been Divinely gifted to me this weekend. And the book that I am reading by Beth Moore — thanks to one of my readers who commented about here — has a whole section on Dignity that is strengthening me.

I feel like the old Andrea is back, only a million times better. I was the frog dying in boiling water. Now that I am out, there is no way I want to sully back into that mirky water again, thank you very much — not when I have crystal blue waters in front of me. I’m quite happy where I’m at actually. I feel, finally, that I can have a better life than I’ve had lately, and by lately I mean the last few years, even when I was married. (You still are married, Andrea!) I have realized that my life was not being lived fully for quite some time now. Today I’m on the path to living an incredible life with Grace and Dignity, my two best friends. I wont be going this alone. And you, dear readers, knew this all along, didn’t you?

I’ve had these incredible two days with my boy. We shoveled, snuggled, watched movies, played cars and trains, baked cookies, made these incredible peanut butter rice crispy treats (and yes, I will be sharing those with you at some point!) and even trudged out earlier this evening, bundled and protected from the biting cold, to enjoy a moonlit walk around the block — just me and my boy. It was awesome. At one point Oliver stopped us in the middle of the block. He hushed me and said, “Listen, Momma!” We stood in silence. Altho it was evening, it was brightly lit thanks to a full moon and eerily quiet, just still enough for me to hear God whispering in my ear, “You’re alright kid. You’re doing great. Just like I said you would. Keep on lovin’ that boy and you’re gonna be just fine. Life is good, isn’t it? Look at all I have provided for you. It’s all gonna work out, just like I said it would. Just you wait.”

How did Oliver know God had something to say to me just then? And with that, we headed home, back to our warm, comfortable, cozy life.


  1. I am so happy that you've found these friends (d&g...not just for fashionistas!). this post was so uplifting. O is such a smarty...knew when to have you listen!

  2. Andrea, that is the way to go! And you know what? It will even get better. Sometimes, the very thing or person, that we believe we can't be without, is what is standing in our way to live a truly happy and full life. It is paradox but I speak from my own experience.

    Keep going forward because there is a great future waiting for you and the little guy.


  3. So glad to hear you're reading Beth Moore, Andrea!

    Let me know if you've ever checked out Epikos.


  4. Actually Ron, I have a date w/a friend to attend this Sunday. :)



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