When You Say Nothing at All

Learn to appreciate difficult days. Be stimulated by the challenges you encounter along your way. As you journey thru rough terrain, gain confidence from your knowledge that together we can handle anything. The knowledge is comprised of three parts: your relationship with Me, promises, and past experiences of coping successfully during hard times.
Look back on your life, and see how I have helped you thru difficult days. If you are tempted to think, "Yes, but that was then, this is now." remember who I am! Altho you and your circumstances may change dramatically, I remain the same throughout time and eternity. This is the basis of your confidence. In My Presence, you live and move and have your being.
Jesus Calling, November 8

How true that is. I am finding my way thru the difficult days. I am feeling more and more confident as the days pass. I have walked thru a lot, but I am stronger and better for it. I don't want to go thru what I went thru the past 6 months again. But I have learned things, unfortunately, that I could not have learned any other way (for me). I'm happier today. I am stronger today. I'm a healthier person today. I survived, when I thought for certain I would diminish into dust.

And.... I'm not in the kind of pain I've been in for the past few months.

The difficult days are not over. Nothing much has changed in the marriage yet. I still have hope, but I am moving thru my days with the confidence that not matter what I will be OK. In fact, I have finally started to comprise a list of qualities that I want in a partner. I am done listening to sad songs. I am listening to songs about healthy, happy love stories. I want that. I want someone who has my back.

Here's one of my favorites. It's a beautiful song. I heard it a few times this summer in Door County, whilst driving those long country roads. It touched my heart and soul and gave me hope in a time where there was only a little. Today it's a song that I listen to often, knowing that it's possible for God to bring someone into my life who will give me just this. Or perhaps if it's not a partner, then it's the feeling of true joy, peace and happiness that this song talks about. Either way, I'm fine. I know I have a lot to give someone. I have plenty of people in my life whom I can share my love with. I have more work to do, yes, but don't we all? I am confident today that I'm finally settling softly into a deep sea of calmness, a blessed home in myself where I am at peace.